I'm just going to say it. People in Mathews County, Virginia, can be clannish. Unfriendly. There will be some who deny it, but I'm the newcomer, so that makes me the authority on the subject. Like it or not.
Once I went to a "Church Bazaar" (which turned out to be a yard sale) and the only person who spoke to me was the lady checking me out! I was there, alone, for 30 minutes! At a church!!
The people that walk up and down our street, I mean, Charley and I think they might be zombies. They look down at their feet or straight ahead, especially when we are sitting on the porch. It's like they are trying not to see us.
Once we were fishing very nearby to a family of three, and we said hello to the woman. I swear she looked at me as if she wanted to pull my heart out with her bare hands. Fer real.
Then there was the realtor who took Charley and I to look at a couple of rental houses. She went on and on about how much she loved children, and never once spoke to, or even looked at, Charley, who was riding in her backseat.
And you know what's kinda sad? I am feeling a little reluctant to give my Dad's old Mercury Grand Marquis back, because ever since I started driving that car, people actually wave at me. Now, I know it's because they either think I'm a little old lady they know, or the law, but when they stick those four fingers up off their steering wheel to wave, it makes me feel special.
A couple of months ago, I decided I was tired being friendly. I just wasn't going to work at it anymore. After a few days, I realized that wasn't the way. God wouldn't want me to act that way. So, I went the other direction. I just started letting that sweet southern syrup ooze out of me. Then, I found people don't really have a choice in the matter. They had to reciprocate.
Now there are some who will speak and show kindness. When we go to church, people reach out, and try to make us feel welcome. The lady at the post office....she's nice. There's Missy at the library; I like her. A few folks at Food Lion, The Cake Man Owners, those two girls that work at Richardson's (of course they're from deeper south), that man with the nice teeth at Grover's, of course there's the Dubois Family and their extended family, Amy my neighbor, the old man that jogs on Gwynn's Island in the morning, a few teachers at Charley's school, the lady that sits on her porch and waves, hmmmm. I am sure there are some I am leaving out. And while I realize that is a long list, most of them we met because we had a reason to meet. My car is broken. My groceries need paying for. My mail needs mailed. I need a refill. You know, the usual.
A little hello with a smile, tip of the head, how ya doin', goes a long way, people. Reach out. Be friendlier. Dang.
And if you are one of the friendly few, please know, I recognize that. In fact, if you were friendly to me or my family, then I haven't forgotten. Thank you for your kindness. I truly, truly, appreciate you.
2 Comments
Keep dishing out the friendly and some of it will bounce back at you.
ReplyDeleteAmen. And you are right to keep giving the sweetness. That's my method when breaking the hard candy shells of New Yorkers, who are notoriously tough. I just dork out and show some kindness... I figured out a while ago that they are just as soft on the inside as we are. They are just more protective of it, so we have to coerce them a bit and show them we are safe.
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